Why Legacy Should Be Part of Every New Client Conversation
Don’t wait to ask — the most important question might be the one they’re waiting to answer
When a new client walks into your office, the rhythm is familiar: introductions, goals, discovery, documents, deadlines. There’s a lot to cover — and in those early meetings, it’s easy to focus on the urgent, technical work of financial planning. But beneath all that structure, clients often bring something else into the room: the desire to talk about legacy.
Too often, advisors save that conversation for later. After the estate plan. After the portfolio review. After retirement projections. But we’ve found that asking about legacy early doesn’t distract from the plan — it transforms it.
At Total Family, we believe that legacy is not a “someday” topic. It belongs in the first conversation, because it’s already on your client’s mind — even if they haven’t said it out loud yet.
Don’t Wait for the Perfect Time — Create It
You don’t need to host a workshop. You don’t need to prepare a long presentation. All it takes is a single line on your meeting agenda — and one open-ended question:
“What does legacy mean to you?”
This simple prompt does two things:
It signals to your client that you see the whole picture — not just their assets, but their intentions.
It gives them permission to talk about something they may not have felt safe or ready to bring up otherwise.
We’ve seen this question unlock deep conversations in the very first meeting. Clients share stories, hopes, fears — not because you asked them to disclose details, but because you asked a question no one else had. One client even asked to bring their spouse to the next meeting, saying, “We’ve been wanting to talk about this for years. No one’s ever asked us before.”
Why Advisors Often Miss the Moment
Many advisors assume legacy is outside their scope. It’s easy to think: That’s the attorney’s domain. That’s part of estate planning. That comes later. But clients don’t see it that way. To them, legacy isn’t just legal — it’s personal. And they’re wondering if you can help them think it through.
Here’s the truth: if you don’t bring up legacy, they’ll assume it’s not part of what you do. And maybe the next advisor will ask the question you didn’t.
But you’re already on the edge of this conversation. You’re asking about values, priorities, and long-term vision. Legacy is just one step further — and clients are more than ready for it.
Legacy Is the Missing Layer in Most Financial Plans
At its core, legacy is about what lasts — not just what you leave behind, but what you pass forward. That might include assets, but it also includes identity, values, relationships, and stories. When families don’t talk about those things, confusion often fills the gap.
That’s why we see so much momentum building around emotional inheritance, values-based planning, and next-generation family engagement. These aren’t fringe ideas — they’re becoming central to how high-capacity families want to plan.
At Total Family, we work with advisory firms across the country to help integrate these legacy conversations into their planning process. Through our FamilyOS platform, guided tools, and facilitation services, we help families define a shared vision — and put it in writing.
How to Introduce Legacy Without Losing Focus
Adding legacy to your process doesn’t mean taking time away from technical planning. In fact, it can enhance it. Here’s how to begin without overwhelming your client or derailing your agenda:
Include “Legacy” on the meeting agenda. Even just one bullet point sends a strong signal.
Use the question as a check-in. You don’t need to dive deep right away. Ask: “When you think about your long-term legacy, what comes to mind?” Let them take it from there.
Reflect back what you hear. Even a small comment like, “That’s helpful context — we’ll keep that in mind as we look at your plan,” reinforces that legacy and finance are connected.
By making space early, you plant the seed. And often, clients will bring it up again — not because you pushed it, but because you created space for it.
What Clients Are Really Looking For
Underneath the surface, many clients are asking silent questions:
How do I make sure my kids are prepared, not entitled?
What’s the best way to pass on values, not just wealth?
What if our family loses direction after I’m gone?
They may not say it that way. But it shows up in how they talk about adult children, family roles, or what keeps them up at night. These are the moments where legacy work begins — not with answers, but with a listening ear.
Why This Matters More Than Ever
We’re living in a time of massive generational transition. Over the next two decades, trillions of dollars in wealth will transfer from one generation to the next. But without conversations about identity, vision, and purpose, that wealth is often diluted — and so is the connection between family members.
Clients are looking for advisors who can help them plan for more than just tax efficiency. They want someone who can help them steward their influence, shape their family’s future, and pass on the things that matter most.
This is your opportunity to be that advisor.
Legacy Planning Isn’t Extra — It’s Essential
You don’t have to have all the answers. You just have to ask the question. And when you do, you’ll stand out — not because of a product, but because of your posture.
At Total Family, we help advisors make these conversations easier and more actionable. Through tools like FamilyOS, we give clients a place to write legacy letters, clarify family vision, and preserve what matters — in their own words.
The starting point is simple:
Add one line to the agenda. Ask one question. Then listen.
Because legacy doesn’t start with a plan.
It starts with a conversation.
