about us

Pioneers of the

FamilyOS Category

We’re built for families who want to:

There’s no such thing as a “normal” family. Family is sacred ground—defined by you: nuclear, blended, chosen, or beautifully complicated. When families invest in connection, values, and purpose, everybody wins.

We started Total Family to pioneer the FamilyOS category. FamilyOS by Total Family turns intention into practice—aligning Values and Roles, building a shared language, and helping families make big decisions with clarity and confidence.

A film strip with four scenes, each containing a motivational quote overlayed on the images. The scenes depict social gatherings and celebrations.

Whether you're building a family foundation, preparing for a liquidity event, or simply trying to have fewer awkward Thanksgiving conversations—we’re here to help.

“I wish a company like Total Family had existed when I needed it. But since it didn’t, we built it.”

— Alex Kirby, Founder & CEO

Why We Exist.

What We Believe.

Vision makes everything clearer.

Vision= Purpose + Values + Roles

A young woman in a strapless wedding dress with a large bow at the back stands in front of a mirror while an older woman styles her hair.
A family of four sitting and standing in front of a house with wooden shingles. The father, wearing a suit and sunglasses, is seated in a chair. The mother, holding a purse and seated, is next to him. Their daughter is standing on a chair behind the seated woman, and their son is standing to the right of the seated woman. The house has multiple windows with shutters, and there are shrubs in the background.

Culture eats strategy
for breakfast

A young boy and an older man standing next to a large, open-mouthed sculpture of a whale in an outdoor desert-like area with trees and a partly cloudy sky in the background.

True family wealth
is well being

A young man sitting on the hood of a vintage two-tone car with mountains in the background.

Great families are built with intentions

Our Values.

Connection

Authenticity

Hope

Support

Humor

frequently asked questions

  • A FamilyOS is a shared operating system for families: a simple way to align Values, Purpose, and Roles, capture stories and decisions, and support deeper connection through life’s changes.

  • FamilyOS by Total Family turns good intentions into guided steps—shared-language tools, prompts, and rhythms—so advisors and families can talk about what matters and act on it together.

    • Wealth Advisors & Firms ready to open human conversations at scale

    • Families & Couples who want less friction and more connection

  • Personal vision is about you. It’s your chance to reflect on your values (what matters most), your purpose (your “why”), and your roles (the parts of life you’re focused on right now).  It helps you get clear on who you are and how you want to show up—and gives you a common language to talk about what matters.

    Family vision builds on that. Once each person has defined their own vision, you can come together with your significant other to create a shared one—rooted in clarity, connection, and that same common language.

    That’s why we always start with your personal vision first. It gives everyone a voice and makes it easier to build something meaningful, together.

  • Any individual can sign up at totalfamily.io/join to complete their personal vision. From there, you're strongly encouraged to invite your significant other to join you—so you can begin building a shared vision together.

    Once both people have joined, the software will link you as a household. The platform and our coaching are designed to support individuals and couples every step of the way.

  • Totally normal. You only see your family—but we’ve worked with lots of families, and trust us: every family has its quirks. The truth is, even with all the chaos, most people wouldn’t trade their family for anything.

    What you’ll get with Total Family is a process that’s positive, proactive, and practical—no matter what your starting point looks like.

    • Positive – Energizing, strength-based conversations. Maybe even fun?

    • Proactive – Like going to the gym for your relationships. You don’t have to wait for a crisis.

    • Practical – Everyone’s busy. But if family really is important, it’s worth pausing now and then to invest in it.

    Wild or not, you’re in the right place.



  • There’s no perfect life stage—but we’ve found that 8 out of 10 Total Family clients are parents or have children. These might be toddlers just learning to walk or adult kids who are long in the tooth themselves.

    That said, Total Family is for anyone—individuals, couples, or families—who are willing to spend a little time reflecting on what matters most. Whether it’s your personal values, your family culture, or the legacy you want to build, what matters more than your life stage is your mindset.

    If you’re ready to have more intentional conversations about your life and relationships, you’re in the right place.